Two Under Two
After we had our second son Jayce, you could clearly notice the difference in energy in our household. Cairo was 21 months when Jayce was born and never did I understand just how hectic having two under two would be until it hit us full force and there was no turning back, lol.
Cairo, our sweet but energetic toddler mixed with a newborn who demands our full attention as well, was a lot to manage to say the least. The house at times felt like chaos. I think the majority of our conversations consisted of phrases like “Don’t touch that!” “Don’t do that!” “The baby is sleeping!” “Get away from there!”
And we hadn’t even hit the terrible twos yet; however, I stand in agreement with my mother in law who says, we’re going to call them the terrific twos. I hate to speak anything terrible into existence so we’re going to tackle year two the best we can - while handling our infant….at the same time.
The “witching hour” never meant anything at all to me — until I was responsible for feeding, bathing, and putting both boys down for bed while my husband works late hours away from home. 6pm - 7pm in my house is absolutely THE hardest hour of the day.
Because that's when both kids are crying, tired, hungry, impatient, spitting up, pooping, and needy and I just can't always tend to both at the same time. So yes, the whole house is chaos. You go to help one that's crying and then the other starts crying. Now they're both crying, and I'm almost crying too because WOW lol. Then when alllll the chaos is over ... in walks my husband from work 😑
It never fails.
I will definitely say the first three to four months with the boys were SO HARD as we ALL adjusted to finding our new rhythm. Sleepless nights, tears, tantrums, you name it. (And the boys struggled as well 😆) But once we found our rhythm and my toddler started understanding he needed to be a big boy while mommy tended to baby brother - things became easier. I learned a schedule that worked. I learned who to tend to first. We developed a routine that worked for us, and when daddy was home by dinner time it was even better because we could really help each other. Our dinner/bedtime schedule is below, in case any other mommies need an example:
Night-time Routine
5pm - Mommy picks toddler up from daycare (usually starts dinner around 4pm while I work from home)
5:30pm - Arrive home - playtime / TV time
6pm - mommy or daddy fixes dinner plates
6:30pm - bath time (daddy)
6:45pm - nurse infant
7pm - story, prayers, and bedtime
So, needless to say, two under two or even two under three (which we now have) is BUSY! But I am so glad Cairo has his built in best friend. The boys being so close in age turned out to be a blessing in disguise. And quite naturally we are still finding our rhythm- that will never change. Each week brings on new milestones, new challenges, new successes, more laughs, and more things to learn.
So to the mom that is managing two under two while still healing from labor and delivery, or working through postpartum, or is just trying to get adjusted and find your rhythm - my only advice is to be patient with yourself, with your babies, and even with your partner. Parenting in general just takes TONSSS of patience. Trial and error. Learning that what works for one kid just may not work for the other but it’s ok because eventually you do find your rhythm. You begin to relish in those moments with your babies more and more and there are periods you forget how hard it is and you just soak in how grateful you are that THIS is the life God blessed you with.
🤍 J. Leigh
